Racism:
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Q: What do you call a gathering of black men in a barn?
A: Antique Farming Equipment.
Q: What do you call a black man that has a peg leg?
A: Shit on a stick.
Q. Why do black people always have sex on their minds?
A. Because the have pubes on their heads.
Q. What do you call 2 blacks on a bike?
A. Organized Crime.
Q. How come black women never wear panties to a picnic?
A. To keep the flies away from the chicken.
Q. Why do blacks call white people "honkies"?
A. Because it's the last sound they hear before getting hit.
Q. Why did the black man kill the other black man?
A. There was only one chicken leg left.
Q. How do you know when an asian person has robbed your house?
A. Your homework is done, your computer has been upgrades, but 2 hours later he is still trying to back out of your driveway.
Q. How do you blindfold an asian?
A. By using dental floss.
Q. What do you call a mexican that is getting baptised?
A. Bean Dip
Q. How do you hide money from a mexican and a black?
A. Hide it under a bottle of soap.
Q. Why is it so easy to teach an Arab to fly?
A. You only have to teach them to take off.
Q. What do Arab's call a piece of sand paper?
A. A map.
Q. What do you call an Arab with his hand up a camel's ass?
A. A mechanic.
Q. What does one gay say to the other gay before going on vacation?
A. Can I help you pack your shit?
Q. How do you know your at a gay picnic?
A. The hotdogs taste like shit.
Q. How do you fit three gay guys on one barstool?
A. Turn it upside down.
Q. Why did the gay get fired from the sperm bank?
A. They caught him drinking on the job.
Q. What do you call a lesbian eskimo?
A. A Klondike.
Q. Whats the difference between a Jew and a pizza?
A. The pizza doesn't scream when you put it in an oven.
Q. Whats the differene between a Jew and a canoe?
A. The canoe tips.
Q. How do you get 50 Jews in a car?
A. Throw a quarter in it.
Q. How do you get them out?
A. Tell them Hitler is driving.
Q. Whats faster than a speeding bullet?
A. A Jew with a coupon.
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Random Jokes:
A Jewish Rabbi and a Catholic Priest were driving on the same road and collided with each other. Both cars are totaled and so the men are standed 20 miles from the city. The Rabbi walks up to the Priest and said "I think God wanted us to meet other and talk." The Priest agreed. The Rabbi asked the Priest if he was thirsty as he had a drink in the car. The Priest without hesitating said: "Yes, I haven't had a drink in a while, what do you have?" The Rabbi responded: I have 2 bottles of wine, 1 for me and 1 for you. The Priest told him to break out the bottles of wine because it was going to be a while. So the Priest started drinking his bottle and talked with the Rabbi and eventually drinks the entire bottle. The Rabbi hasn't tasted a drop. The Priest says: "You haven't touched your bottle, is there something wrong?" The Rabbi cracked a smile and responded with: "No, there's nothing wrong, I'm just waiting for the cops to get here
."A man just got out of church and started on his drive home. It was a dark night and up ahead he saw a vehicle swerving back and forth. "Sigh, this guy is drunker than a skunk, I might as well pass him before he has a wreck" the man said. As he starts to speeds he gets right beside the drunk and the drunk swerves toward him. The man runs off the road and into a ditch flipping his car 2 times. The drunk discovering what had happened backed up and asked the man "Are you ok?" The man responded "Ya, Jesus is with me." The drunk responded "Well you better let him ride with me, you almost got him killed."
A blonde walks into a TV store and asks the clerk if she could exchange her TV for a new one. The clerk responded with "We don't sell to blondes." So the blonde stomps out mad and goes home to dye her hair red. She walks in the store again and asks the same thing. The clerk resonds with "We don't sell to blondes." So she storms back off home and dyes her hair black. She goes back to the store and asks the same thing yet again. The clerk responds with "We don't sell to blondes." So the blonde confused asks how he knows she is a blonde. The clerk responds, "This is a TV shop and you are carrying a microwave around."
A blonde, redhead, and brunette are all stuck on an Island and calculate that it was about 200 meters to the next Island which would bring them closer to land. The redhead starts swimming first and got to 20 meters and drowned. The brunette goes second and makes it to 100 meters and drowns. The blonde starts swimming and as she reaches 187 meters says: "I'm tired so I'm gonna head back."
After their ship crashed a man with no arms and no legs is stranded on an island with three gorgeous women. Feeling sorry for the man, the first woman asks, have you ever been hugged? The man replies with no, so she gives him a big comfortable hug. The second woman asks, have you ever been kissed? The man replies with no, so she gives him a juicy kiss. The third woman asks have you ever been fucked? The man, with his eyes lighting up, replies with no. The woman responds, well you are now because the tide is coming in!
