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If you can’t read it, it says the following:
Student response:

Civil War Hero -

During the Civil War many people influenced because of being such great Heroes. Well only one of these people actually did something. This was a man amongst men it is just a shame that he was killed.

Jesus was probably the main factor why the Divil war was fought the way it was. Not only was Jesus super cool he was really smart. Jesus was born in 1923 about the time of the roaring 20’s (or when you were born Btw did you go to school with him.) Si anyways everyone knew Jesus was something great. When he turned three he mastered the pogo stick everyone knows how hard that damn thing is. Shortly after ge was bored with it so he bought a bike. One day he was out on this nice bike he just spent a lot of money on and some black guy stole it out from underneath him. He ran after him for hours screaming, “nigga stole my bike!” no one did anything at all. This is when he knew it was time for a change. He quickly learned that black people don’t steal scooters. So he asked Marty Melfy could bring him one from the past because those things died along with president Clinton. He got his scooter and rode it from Springfield New York all the way to Olympia Washington, that’s like 5 billion miles that’s e lot even for an airplane. Once he got there he came ip with a plan, this plan seemed crazy, it was called the non-violent protest. He sat around for days until someone just told him he could have the government. He decided that black peoeple needed to stop stealing bikes. Because of this the Civil War broke out. The Civil war was between China and Pakistan. The people fought for about fifty years the war finally ended in 2020 . But only because China was like Jesus we are out of ammo, Jesus simply replied “What do I have to work with?” he only had a banana, 15 seconds later he developed the atom bomb and dropped it on Pakistan and killed a lot of people. The people thought Jesus was moding so they quit and joined a new server. Once the war was over Jesus was hit by a car, and with his last breath he said “warship me!” and died.

As you can see without Jesus the world would be a terrible place. All over the world black people would be stealing your bike. So without him, we all would be helpless.

Teacher response:

There are clear issues with the paper. As one cal tell you seemed to have taken this as a joke. Along with numerous grammatical and structural errors, you failed to prove anything with the presented information. With that I will need to speak with you and arrange a new paper topic.

At my first year of college my physics teacher told us this rather amusing story, I’ve never forgotten this story - but I certainly have forgotten everything I learned in that class.

The following question was asked at the University of Copenhagen in a physics exam:

“”Describe how to determine the height of a skyscraper with a barometer.”

One student replied:

“You tie a long piece of string to the neck of the barometer, then lower the barometer from the roof of the skyscraper to the ground. The length of the string plus the length of the barometer will equal the height of the building.”

This highly original answer so incensed the examiner that the student was failed immediately. He appealed on the grounds that his answer was indisputably correct, and the university appointed an independent arbiter to decide the case. The arbiter judged that the answer was indeed correct, but did not display any noticeable knowledge of physics. To resolve the problem it was decided to call the student in and allow him six minutes in which to provide a verbal answer which showed at least a minimal familiarity with the basic principles of physics. For five minutes the student sat in silence, forehead creased in thought. The arbiter reminded him that time was running out, to which the student replied that he had several extremely relevant answers, but couldn’t make up his mind which to use. On being advised to hurry up the student replied as follows:

“Firstly, you could take the barometer up to the roof of the skyscraper, drop it over the edge, and measure the time it takes to reach the ground. The height of the building can then be worked out from the formula H = 0.5g x t squared. But bad luck on the barometer.

“Or if the sun is shining you could measure the height of the barometer, then set it on end and measure the length of its shadow. Then you measure the length of the skyscraper’s shadow, and thereafter it is a simple matter of proportional arithmetic to work uut the height of the skyscraper.

“But if you wanted to be highly scientific about it, you could tie a short piece of string to the barometer and swing it like a pendulum, first at ground level and then on the roof of the skyscraper. The height is worked out by the difference in the gravitational restoring force T = 2 pi sqrroot (l/g).

“Or if the skyscraper has an outside emergency staircase, it would be easier to walk up it and mark off the height of the skyscraper in barometer lengths, then add them up.

“If you merely wanted to be boring and orthodox about it, of course, you could use the barometer to measure the air pressure on the roof of the skyscraper and on the ground, and convert the difference in millibars into feet to give the height of the building.

But since we are constantly being exhorted to exercise independence of mind and apply scientific methods, undoubtedly the best way would be to knock on the janitor’s door and say to him ‘If you would like a nice new barometer, I will give you this one if you tell me the height of this skyscraper’.”

The student was Nils Bohr, the first Dane to win the Nobel prize for Physics. “