In New Jersey, frowning at a police officer is against the law.
In Alabama, boogers cannot be flicked into the wind. (As if anyone can catch them in the act
).
In Alaska, moose may not be viewed from an airplane.
In Alaska, moose may not be pushed from an airplane. (Wtf
Poor moose.)
In Alabama, pouring salt onto a railroad track may be punishable by death. (Harsh..)
In Arizona, any misdemeanor committed while wearing a red mask is a felony. (Er. GG Spiderman?)
In Arizona, if you are being robbed by a burgular or a criminal, you may only defend yourself with the same weapon as the attacker.
In Arkansas, it is illegal for the Arkansas River to rise higher than to the Main Street bridge in Little Rock. (Good luck enforcing that.)
In California, Peacocks have the right of way to cross any street.
In Connecticut, it is illegal for fire trucks to exceed 25mph, even when going to a fire.
In Florida, if an elephant is left tied to a parking meter, the parking fee has to be paid just as it would for a vehicle.
In Florida, it is considered an offense to shower naked.
In Florida, a woman can be fined (only after death), for being electrocuted in a bath-tub because of using self-beautification utensils. (Good luck getting that fine.)
In Florida, the state constitution allows for freedom of speech, a trial by jury, and pregnant pigs to not be confined in cages. (I rofl'd.)
In Georgia, It is illegal for a chicken to cross the road.
In Georgia, it is illegal for a giraffe to be tied to a lamppost or telephone pole.
In Hawaii, residents can be fined for not owning a boat.
In Idaho, men are not allowed to give their loved ones a box of chocolates UNLESS it weighs more than 50 lbs. (I bet a denist made that law.)
In Illinois, you must contact the police before entering the city in an automobile.
In Illinois, you can be arrested for vagrancy if you do not have at least one dollar on you.
In Illinois, a rooster must step back three hundred feet from any residence if he wishes to crow. Hens that wish to cackle must step two hundred feet back from any residence. (This one works well, I bet.)
In Indiana, a man over 18 can and will be arrested for statuatory rape if a woman in the passenger's seat is under 17 and is not wearing socks or shoes.
In Iowa, the fire department is required to practice fire fighting for fifteen minutes
before attending a fire. (Sucks for that house..)
In Kansas, the installation of bathtubs is prohibited. (My doubts on this one..)
In Kentucky, dogs may not molest cars. (Sorry, Rex, no car for you.)
In Kentucky, throwing eggs at a public speaker could result in up to one year in prison. (Only eggs?)
Lousiana (many dumb ones here!)
Code: Select all
It is illegal to shoot lasers at police officers. (Sorry kids, laser tag is off limits now.)
One could land in jail for up to a year for making a false promise.
Every time a person is seriously burned, he must report the injury to the fire marshal.
It is illegal to rob a bank and then shoot at the bank teller with a water pistol.
Biting someone with your natural teeth is "simple assault," while biting someone with your false teeth is "aggravated assault."
Persons could land in jail for up to ten years for stealing an alligator. (GET OFF OF MY ALLIGATOR)
It is a $500 fine to instruct a pizza delivery man to deliver a pizza to your friend without them knowing. (Hmm...)
You may not tie an alligator to a fire hydrant.
It illegal for a woman to drive a car unless her husband is waving a flag in front of it. (So...she has to be running him over?)
No person may predict another's future.
It is illegal to be an alcoholic.
In Maine, shotguns are
required to be taken to church in the event of a Native American attack. (Wtf Native Americans?!)
In Maine, you may not step out of a plane in flight. (Kind of hard to punish someone for doing that...)
In Maine, advertisements may not be placed in cemeteries. (Darn...)
In Massachussettes, all men must carry a rifle to church on Sunday. (Those darn Native Americans again?)
In Massachussettes, no gorilla is allowed in the back seat of any car. (What inspired this?!)
In Massachussettes, one may not detonate a nuclear device in the city. (If they already detonated it, how would you punish them..)
In Massachussettes, an ordinance prohibits the use of space guns. (Take that you aliens!)
Minnesota (MORE!)
Code: Select all
The land of 10,000 lakes declares mosquitos a public nuisance. (Finally, someone who is sane.)
A person may not cross state lines with a duck atop his head.(
Citizens may not enter Wisconsin with a chicken on their head. (Minnesota is starting to worry me...)
All bathtubs must have feet.
You're not allowed to park your elephant on Main Street.
In Mississippi, the fine for waving a gun in public is higher than actually shooting it. (I'll remember that for next time =3)
In Missouri, speed limits are found unconstitutional.
In Montana, it is a misdemeanor to show movies that depict acts of felonious crime. (So Disney would be breaking the law? Even Lion King had murder!)
In Montana, it is illegal to bring a bomb or rocket at city council proceedings. (What happened there o_o)
In Nebraska, if a child burps during church, his parent may be arrested. (So if you hate your parents, just burp!)
In Nebraska, it is illegal for bar owners to sell beer unless they are simultaneously brewing a kettle of soup. (Why soup?)
In Nevada, it's still "legal" to hang someone for shooting your dog on your property.
In New Hampshire, any cattle that crosses state roads must be fitted with a device to gather its feces. (O_O)
In New Jersey, it is illegal to wear a bullet-proof vest while committing a murder.
In New Jersey, all motorists must honk before passing another car, bicyclist, skater, and even a skateboarder.
In New Jersey, all cats must wear three bells to warn birds of their whereabouts. (RUN BIRDS RUN!)
In New Mexico, idiots may not vote. (What constitutes an "idiot"?)
In New York, the punishment for jumping off the top of a skyscraper is death. (Beware!)
In New York, women may go topless in public, providing it is not being used as a business.
In New York, it is illegal for a woman to be on the street wearing "body hugging clothing." (Um...these last two laws contradict each other...)
More dumb ones! North Carolina!
Code: Select all
Persons in possession of illegal substances must pay taxes on them. However, paying taxes on these items does not make them legal.
Organizations may not hold their meetings while the members present are in costume.
No one may be a professional fortune-teller, and if one wishes to pursue the practice as an amateur, it must be practiced in a school or church.
It's against the law to sing off key. (I guess I'm not allowed to sing... :( )
Elephants may not be used to plow cotton fields.
If a man and a woman who aren't married go to a hotel/motel and register themselves as married then, according to state law, they are legally married.
The mere possession of a lottery ticket is illegal in North Carolina and may result in a $2,000 fine. (Hey, if you win, it's worth it.)
Fights between cats and dogs are prohibited.
It is illegal to drive cars through city cemeteries for pleasure.
No one may visit their departed loved ones late at night. (It'll wake the dead!)
You must stop and call City Hall before entering town in an automobile. This is so the townspeople will have time to go out and hold their horses until you get through town. (Damn tourists!)
In North Dakota, it is legal to shoot an Indian on horseback, provided you are in a covered wagon. (Wtf D:)
In Ohio, a policeman may bite a dog to quiet him. (o_o)
In Pennysylvania, any motorist driving along a country road at night must stop every mile and send up a rocket signal, wait 10 minutes for the road to be cleared of livestock, and continue. (Would you be stranded if you ran out of rockets, considering that you don't have enough to turn back and get more?)
In Pennysylvania, all fire hydrants must be checked one hour before all fires. (If only everyone can predict fires like those guys.)
In Rhode Island, no one may bite off another’s leg. (Glad that's made clear.)
In Rhode Island, Any marriage where either of the parties is an idiot or lunatic is null and void. -SECTION 11-40-1 (Erm...)
South Carolina!!
Code: Select all
Every adult male must bring a rifle to church on Sunday in order to ward off Indian attacks. (What's with the Indian attacks?!)
It is a capital offense to inadvertently kill someone while attempting suicide.
A person must be eighteen years old to play a pinball machine. (Damnit!)
The Fire Department may blow up your house. This law was made so that the fire department could create a fire brake. (I wanna join the Fire Department!)
In South Dakota, no horses are allowed into Fountain Inn unless they are wearing pants. (Erm.)
In South Dakota, if there are more than 5 Native Americans on your property you may shoot them. (WTF IS THIS?!!)
In Tennessee, the definition of "dumb animal" includes every living creature. (Repealed) (Thank God they repealed THIS law.)
In Tennessee, when you pull up to a stop sign you must fire a gun out the window to warn horse carriages that you are coming. (I bet murder rates are high.)
In Texas, a recently passed anticrime law requires criminals to give their victims 24 hours notice, either orally or in writing, and to explain the nature of the crime to be committed. (Well, they must be safe!)
In Texas, it is illegal to sell one’s eye. (Darn.)
In Utah, it is illegal to not drink milk. (Sucks for the lactose intolerant.)
In Washington, it is illegal to attach a vending machine to a utility pole without prior consent from the utility company. Furthermore, if permission is granted, the vending machine may not be less than twelve feet from the ground. (So uh.)
In Washington, you may not ride an ugly horse. (Who's judging?)
In West Virginia, any roadkill must be taken home for supper. (Wtf?!)
In Wisconsin, tattooing is illegal unless it is done for medical purposes.(Soo..this is why: (Written by an unnamed person) "Medical tattoos include adding nipples after reconstructive breast surgery. Some people are also tattood with "target" marks for radiation purposes. (Just to let you know there really are such things as medical tattoos.") )
The best for last!
Oklahoma!
Code: Select all
Dogs must have a permit signed by the mayor in order to congregate in groups of three or more on private property. (It's to prevent their eventual world domination.
Oklahoma will not tolerate anyone taking a bite out of another's hamburger.
It is against the law to read a comic book while operating a motor vehicle.
Whaling is illegal.
Residents are taxed for the furniture in their homes, and any other personal belongings.
People who make "ugly faces" at dogs may be fined and/or jailed.
Cars must be tethered outside of public buildings. (Tethered?)
It is illegal for the owner of a bar to allow anyone inside to pretend to have sex with a buffalo. (Don't want to know...)
One may not tip over a casket at a funeral.
It is illegal to own a stink bomb.
You may not open a soda bottle without the supervision of a licensed engineer. (A licensed engineer of what?)
Elephants are not to be taken into the downtown area.
And the best one so far:
It is illegal to have the hind legs of farm animals in your boots.
(You're probably wondering why. Well, a person who understandably wishes to remain un-named writes: " I'm not sure you really want to know the answer to your question here, but.. If you place the animal's hind legs (let's say a sheep) in the front of your boots... well... it makes it more difficult for the animal to move away from you. And you don't want the animal to move away from you because you really, really like said animal. (Perhaps you even "love" that animal.) Umm. are you getting the picture here?")
I lol'd.
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) _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ Which Final Fantasy Character Are You?
