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 Post subject: Proverbs [joke]
PostPosted: March 7th, 2010, 2:02 pm 
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Shopping Maul USA Creator
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Joined: January 18th, 2007, 11:07 am
Posts: 1992
Location: Calgary Canada
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1. A day without sunshine is like night.


2. On the other hand, you have different fingers.


3. 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.




4. 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.


5. Remember, half the people you know are below average.


6. He who laughs last, thinks slowest.


7. Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.


8. The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese in the trap.


9. Support bacteria. They're the only culture most people have.


10. A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.


11. Change is inevitable, except from vending machines.


12. If you think nobody cares, try missing a couple of payments.




13. How many of you believe in psycho-kinesis? Raise my hand.


14. OK, so what's the speed of dark?


15. When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.




16. Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.




17. How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges?




18. Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.




19. What happens if you get scared half to death, twice?




20. Why do psychics have to ask you your name?




21. Inside every older person is a younger person wondering, 'What the heck happened?'




22. Just remember -- if the world didn't suck, we would all fall off.




23. Light travels faster than sound. That's why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.




24. Life isn't like a box of chocolates. It's more like a jar of jalapenos. What you do today, might burn your butt tomorrow.

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 Post subject: Re: Proverbs [joke]
PostPosted: March 7th, 2010, 2:38 pm 
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Grammar King
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Joined: June 22nd, 2008, 10:11 pm
Posts: 2410
Location: Mostly USEast
Title: Worst human for 4eva
Vegas wrote:
6. He who laughs last, thinks slowest.
8. The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese in the trap.
10. A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
11. Change is inevitable, except from vending machines.
13. How many of you believe in psycho-kinesis? Raise my hand.
16. Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.
17. How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges?
22. Just remember -- if the world didn't suck, we would all fall off.
23. Light travels faster than sound. That's why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.


LOLs. Number 6 is definitely the best, though.

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(20:53:56) Bartimaeus: Truly, you are wise.


Quote:
(23:44:12) Bartimaeus: I was in pubic school until middle school...


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 Post subject: Re: Proverbs [joke]
PostPosted: March 7th, 2010, 9:01 pm 
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Joined: October 26th, 2009, 10:22 pm
Posts: 344
Title: mib^
i think 23. is best... hehe..

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Spoiler:
(06:05:25) UndeadxAssassin: SLANDER
(06:05:32) Bartimaeus: See you later, Undead. I miss talking to you. Message me once in a while, :<
(06:05:37) UndeadxAssassin: /quit Bartimaeus!
(06:05:40) ChatBot: Madara logs into the Chat.
(06:05:49) ChatBot: Madara has been logged out (Kicked).
(06:05:54) Bartimaeus: >>
(06:06:02) Bartimaeus: He doesn't deserve to see my good bye to you, :D
(06:06:23) UndeadxAssassin: I'm still here because I wanna see his response
(06:06:29) UndeadxAssassin: :D
(06:06:31) ChatBot: Madara logs into the Chat.
(06:06:31) Bartimaeus: Oh.
(06:06:35) Bartimaeus: lol
(06:06:43) Madara: So should i say something dramatic
(06:06:48) Madara: or what satisfies u ?
(06:06:48) Bartimaeus: Nope.
(06:06:50) Bartimaeus: Because nobody cares.
(06:06:52) Bartimaeus: :3
(06:06:57) UndeadxAssassin: What a let down
(06:06:58) UndeadxAssassin: I'm leaving.


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